13 Reasons Why. My opinions.

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13 Reasons Why. Netflix poster.

13 Reasons why is one of the best selling novel which got picked up to be made into a show by Netflix. The show was releases in March 2017 and it has become a hit. It tells the story of a girl who has committed suicide and before that, she recorded 13 reason why she has decided to kill herself into tapes and send them out to the people who are the reason why it happened. This show is intense because it shows the reality of what teenagers or people go through, when bullying gets brushed off because it seems like a norm and how people may look okay on the surface but is confused and suffering inside.

 

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13 Reasons Why. Original book cover. 

I’ve read the book a few years ago and I’ll be honest, I don’t actually remember the story exactly, but watching this show helps remind me the story. I don’t actually know how much of the book they followed or based on, but the main idea is in the show. This show gave me all the feels. Some scenes were disturbing to watch and it got me thinking and scared of what the teenagers I work with goes through in school and in life. It’s hard being a teenager. It’s the time when you’re learning about yourself and adapting to your body. It’s a time where your hormones are acting up and you don’t understand your emotions. It’s a time of wanting to belong, it’s where you want to be relevant.

I was a teen like about 5 years ago, still kinda feel like a teenager sometimes, but I remember how hard it was for me to try and ignore people’s opinion about me, to love myself (my body), to fit into the crow (the cool kids). I wasn’t an emo kid, or angsty teen, I didn’t think about taking my own life, I was a fairly happy kid/teen. But I definitely had growing pains hahaha. Teenage years can be the most awkward part of your life or it could also be the best years of your life(because you’re just happy with everything in life).

The show has received backlash for ‘glorifying’ or ‘glamorizing’ suicide. It supposedly ‘romanticized’  the idea. Before I watched the show I saw the news on E!News about it and in my mind, I though, well i’ts a Hollywood show, of course they’re gonna make it look more dramatic and less scary than it seems. Then of course the casts defended the show and Selena Gomez as the producer say they did not want to glorify suicide, they wanted to show the reality of the issue that people do not speak enough about. The show even got criticized for showing the gruesomeness of how Hannah Baker (the main character) killed herself. The director did not want to hold anything back, they wanted to show people how it really is like.

I’ve been wanting to watch the show because of the hype but I also wanted to see how is the story conveyed, is the message of the issue getting through properly. After watching it, I can say for sure the show did not glorify/ glamorized/ romanticized the idea of suicide or even bullying. It shows the reality of it, it shows how scary teenager can be, it shows how important is it for teenagers to have someone to talk to, it shows how schools should be equipped with counselors who are properly trained to deal with issues like these, it shows how the little things we ignore or brushed off matters.The show even brought the issue of rape ans sexual abuse, it shows how victims are sometimes scared to talk about it because people might not believe them. 13 Reasons Why shows how some people just doesn’t want to outwardly share but want you to reach out to them.

I am scared because I volunteer in a youth ministry and I know I do not always have the time to connect with all the youths but I know they have stories, they have things they’re going through which they don’t share because they’re either scared/ ashamed/ confused about. I then think about the youths who doesn’t have a community, do they have reliable friends who can actually help them? Do they have people or someone older they can talk to? Do they know how to get help when they need it?

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There are so many reasons as to why you should never give up on your life, on yourself. Even when it seems like there are so many reasons as to why you feel like giving up, the reason to not give up outweighs it more.

Sometimes people don’t know you need help until you tell them,that’s why is so important to be able to talk to someone who you trust and can help you. If you know you’re stuck in a bad situation, get help to help you to get out of it. Don’t push people away, especially those you know in your guts that they for sure can help you and do want to help. Sometimes after getting hurt so many times, you just put up walls because you’re scared of judgement and getting hurt again. Know that there will always be at least one person who is always ready to help you and be there for you.

Things get better over time, like wine and cheese. It may look though now, but if you hold on to life and keep moving forward, and learn to let go slowly, it will get better. When you decide for yourself to change things in your life,in the way you think, you’ll see that there’s something to look forward to. A brighter future, a brighter tomorrow. You’ll still have so many things to look forward to. Do things you enjoy, do things that you want and is good for your mind, soul and spirit. I once told my friend that it will get better, when she was frustrated with life and she felt stuck. I told her to hold on. A few months later her life got better, she worked towards what she wanted. Sometimes when you’re ‘stuck’ in the current situation, it feels like your life is gonna look the same for the rest of your life or it feel like it’s too difficult to go through it, just know if you hold on, it’ll get better. I’m very sure of it.

Life is too precious to give up on it. You’ve been given life by your parents, by God. There’s a reason for your life in this world. Just because crap happens and sometimes more than crap happens, it shouldn’t give you a reason to give up. For example heartbreaks may suck and suck the life out of you, it’s also not a good reason to give up on life just because of that. Maybe you don’t see it as precious because people don’t treat it well enough, people don’t appreciate it enough and it has led you to believe that it’s not valuable. Don’t believe in that lie, don’t give in to that lie. There are people who care, there are people who loves you even if you don’t feel like it.

Sometimes you’re just tired of everything and you want to give up. Because the reality is that life is hard. It sometimes feels as if the whole world is against you, it gets hard to breathe, it gets hard to think. So giving up is the easiest thing to do. Take a little more effort to think again if it’s really okay to give up. Maybe all you need is just a little time for yourself, a little more time for your mind to heal, more time for your soul to heal. Give yourself some more time. 

I’m not an expert, I’m not a counselor, but I don’t hope for anyone in this world to take their own life, to give up. I don’t want people to feel like the only option is to take their own life or harm themselves. There’s really so much more in life and it really does get better.

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